I thought I would be in the swamps of Texas by now, drinking Lone Star and completely full of deep fried food, but… no. I’m still in Astoria.

The wonderful people of ATA decided to kick Senor Hancock and me off our flight due to the fact that… wait for it… they oversold every flight to Houston today and tomorrow. So, when will we make it to H-town? Monday… Christmas evening. Oops. Sorry Nana.

La Guardia was a complete mad house. After witnessing this horrible display of humanity, I’ve come to realize that the steps of realizing that you have been denied a seat on your flight that you have paid $484 for is much like those you experience when dealing with the grief of death:

1. Denial: What? No. They can’t do that. I already paid for the ticket. I received an email confirmation and everything. That’s just bad business.

2. Anger: WHAT!?!? I ALREADY PAID FOR THE F$#!@@& TICKET!! THIS FLIGHT BETTER BE FREE!!

3. Bargaining: What? This flight isn’t free? What else can you give me!?

4. Depression: Vouchers? These only take me places that ATA goes, which is a domestic air carrier and totally LAME!

5. Acceptance: Wait? You fly to Mexico? Excellent. Free Mayan fiesta in April.

What do we get for our troubles? $400 each in vouchers to use on any ATA flight for the next year. People were crying, yelling and literally threatening employees. Thank goodness John and I were there to calm each other down because I would have been one of the crying ones, and he one of the yelling ones. We just politely took our vouchers and headed back to his place, stoked about watching Christmas themed DVDs Lee rented.

YES!!! Me…somewhere between steps 3 & 4…