This afternoon on the phone:

FedEx: yes, how can I help you?
Me: uh yeah, I was expecting a package today and our delivery person has come and gone so I wanted to check on it. The tracking number is blahblah666!
FedEx: looks like that package was marked for redirection on Monday, and it takes 2 days for that to process, so your package will be arriving tomorrow.
Me: what? Wait. You said it was marked for redirction on Monday?
FedEx: Yes ma’am.
Me: I called to redirect that package last Friday. On the phone on Friday you guys said it would arrive on Monday. I called on Saturday and you said it would arrive on Tuesday. Now it’s Tuesday and you’re saying that it will arrive tomorrow?
FedEx: Yes. I’m sorry about that. They shouldn’t have told you that they could get it to you that fast because that’s not true.
Me: So, it’s coming tomorrow, Wednesday?
FedEx: Yes.
Me: promise?
FedEx: I can’t do that ma’am.